Mark was walking below the Mangrove Forests of Bangladesh. Wondering who Mark is? He is the latest newborn monkey in Bengal to be baptized for his parents are scared to shit that he will go to limbo even without what he does.
He is walking? Isn’t he supposed to be swinging from tree to tree? , wonders his mother Sue.
“Why is Mark walking? Why is Mark walking?” turns out to be the ringing cry in the forests. From the most recently initiated(hope u know!! I am being a purist here) Kaboor to the still resisting ayush homam Kitna, everyone is shocked to see Mark walking.
So now. Why is Mark walking? I ask myself. Oh! You did not know who I was? I am God and I am patiently watching this irate drama of monkeys!!
Mark is walking because. Because. Because.!
Well! Frankly speaking(No! my name is not Frankly!) I don’t know. If you want to know you have to find that out by yourself. !! I exit.
So now God has left the screen.
We are left with wondering. Why is Mark walking?
If you don’t understand, let us go ahead and see the events of yesterday.
Kaboor and Mark. Swinging across the forest. Listening to their much amplified parents voice over the latest in securing techniques for “MaxSAiZddUdfNmspE”. It has an added feature. It derives power from the swinging tails and uses it to connect tailess to any electric device nearby.
But now kitna is swashing towards them. Her ears are shining with the new wireless earphones “Idapghoffd” that recently added to its repertoire. But she cant hear her parent’s directions and be directed by them.
Kaboor and Mark are laughing at kitna. Kitna happy? Still running clueless? Kitna replies. Kitna laughs. Kitna questions? Kaboor and Mark shocked.
Why be directed by your mom or dad or anyone near you when you can roam free??
But what if we get lost? Learn the world. Kitna difficulty?
Mark is convinced. Kaboor Vehement still. Kitna decisions!!
Mark walks.
All this. For?
As for the monkey who wrote this. She is happy being just born and sings rather than listens. Has decibels to go before the leap. Decibels to go before the leap.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Sarang..my 1000 armed man.
I look at him,
See him as he returns my gaze
My emotions mirrored in his eyes.
I touch him. His smooth mithril body.
I walk to his
warmth enveloping me.
Warmth from the incessant throbbing and
Whirl of his multitude thoughts.
I kiss him lightly on his head.
Feel the dampness of the night before.
As my fingers brush his fingers.
He of the 1000 arms.
They give lightly to mine.
The pressure of my fingers on his.
No words. The slightest change of pressure.
He understands.
My Sarang,you would think,
the 1000 armed man.
My anger, my sorrow, my worries and thoughts.
Barrage him. Buffet him. Bully him and smother him.
He responds.
As fast as I do.
You would think
my 1000 armed man.
He teaches me math.
Smiling at my clumsiness.
He writes crystal english.
Why! You would think,
he is 1000 minded too.
His voice talks on that of anybody around him.
The best mimic.
Hate it when he mimics me though!!!
The tunes he renders across on the violin and the sax,
the percussion on the drums.
You would think he is,
a 1000 armed man.
As I lean across him.
My tears brushing his chest.
He does nothing.
A rock.
To absorb my...me.
I yearn for his arms around me.
You would think,
he was 1000 armed man.
He voices my opinions,
Lends credence to my belief,
He puts forth my plans,
I live for him.
He with me..
Sarang, my 1000 armed man.
I wish he had life. For then. He would be Sarang. My man.
Now he is Sarang, my lappieeeeeeeeeee..
My Laptop.
Sarang, my 1000 minded Laptop.
See him as he returns my gaze
My emotions mirrored in his eyes.
I touch him. His smooth mithril body.
I walk to his
warmth enveloping me.
Warmth from the incessant throbbing and
Whirl of his multitude thoughts.
I kiss him lightly on his head.
Feel the dampness of the night before.
As my fingers brush his fingers.
He of the 1000 arms.
They give lightly to mine.
The pressure of my fingers on his.
No words. The slightest change of pressure.
He understands.
My Sarang,you would think,
the 1000 armed man.
My anger, my sorrow, my worries and thoughts.
Barrage him. Buffet him. Bully him and smother him.
He responds.
As fast as I do.
You would think
my 1000 armed man.
He teaches me math.
Smiling at my clumsiness.
He writes crystal english.
Why! You would think,
he is 1000 minded too.
His voice talks on that of anybody around him.
The best mimic.
Hate it when he mimics me though!!!
The tunes he renders across on the violin and the sax,
the percussion on the drums.
You would think he is,
a 1000 armed man.
As I lean across him.
My tears brushing his chest.
He does nothing.
A rock.
To absorb my...me.
I yearn for his arms around me.
You would think,
he was 1000 armed man.
He voices my opinions,
Lends credence to my belief,
He puts forth my plans,
I live for him.
He with me..
Sarang, my 1000 armed man.
I wish he had life. For then. He would be Sarang. My man.
Now he is Sarang, my lappieeeeeeeeeee..
My Laptop.
Sarang, my 1000 minded Laptop.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
IMHO !! Really?
Excuse me. If you are that humble, you will not have an opinion!! That's the first thought that I ever get when I see that phrase/abbreviation. Now. I continue my not so humble opinion!!!
"Prejudice is a great time saver. You get to form a opinion without wasting time "
E.B. White-- American writer
There are sometimes that I have beheld people being trodden upon by prejudice or preorientation. By preorientation, I mean the premature ideas of a personality formed by an accquaintance. Say : You go to A's party. You have met B who is at the party before sometime. Now B, as soon as you enter, talks about you to C. By the time, you get around to talking to C, you shall have been judged a hundred times, criticised scores more.
If it one thing to form opinions without even have met somebody, it is even worser to tarnish somebody's image without have spoken with them for 10 minutes and that too because they chose to have a different opinion.
For example, you are talking about Asin. A comments that she looks positively ugly. B takes offense immediately. A and B havent even conversed ever and their first talk without having respects for opinions ends up in blows. Will A or B's opinion towards each other help them anywhere else? No. In each's friend circle, they shall be criticised, ridiculed and the extent of their crime magnified a hundred fold.
There was a recent circumstance where my friend was penalised for being close to someone. As always, there was somebody else who wanted to be close to this somebody. Because of pure and uncalled for jealousy, this friend of mine was put to tribulations!!!
I am writing about this for my friend was a victim to it and I realised a few minutes ago that I had been taken for a ride too.
When I am not comfortable with a person's style of doing things, I tell him my opinion and move out. But I dont go about talking about him to all and sundry. Even the closest of my friends shall not know unless I am hurt by the proceedings. If not, it remains a pebble in the well. But I am not adopting the holier than thou attitude.
In an environment like the one America offers, it is possible for us to come out of the narrow thinking and take people as they are and present ourselves the same way without inhibition. We were more powerful in our beliefs and even more in protecting them that we lost track of the notion that everyone has the right to make a decision/have a opinion and stick by it. Also due to the years and years of servility, we adopted the method of passing on things by mouth to ear and spoil the impressions about someone. Again we forget, everybody has a right to form their own opinions.
One of the most irritating forms of opiniations is prejudice. Man!! Have you ever read the "Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Austen. It is one of the most beautiful books I have ever read. It talks about the effects of prejudice in the settings of pre modern England.
Prenotions, prejudgements and prejudice--. Man seems to be enamoured of getting ahead of time. So much that he actually decides a person character at the first mention of the individual.
Sometime before, I was engaged in a pastime with a group of vetti fellow students about judgements and decisions. It was one of the activities that made my mind prompt itself that I should have been teaching management somewhere ( :)) :)).Tsk. Tsk! Conceit!!!)
The game goes like this : The person in D chair shall go ahead and say a word. All others shall guess about it. It maybe an animal, person, thing, place. Only that there shall be only a word and it should be native. Only the phenotic shall help..The word should be put forward with an emotion.
We had very very interesting answers( Chihuahua had the choice of being an romantic hawaiian island or the tallest peak in north eastern Somalia!!) Mary Dream Jane : wow!! The name just evoked the poets in us. :)) :)).
We got to learn that each of us are prejudiced in his or her own way and even the sound of pronunciation of a word (with what emotion it is expressed) completely changed the way we formed opinions. More so when the one in question was a near friend or a relative.
"One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed." --Friedrich Nietzsche (German scholar)
So why am I am ranting about opinions now that I have umpteen number of them in stock. I realised that as much as I am hurt by opinions that people hold of me, they must also feel bad about the opinions I had about them. But the following quote just quashed it.
"We probably wouldnt worry about what people think of us if we could know how seldom they do"--Olin Miller
The worst worst worst opinion I ever ever ever heard about me was when somebody at a local office enquired my accquaintance if I was gay. "It was a joke, of course", laughed my friend with nervous laughter. This was formed from her pronunciation of my name "GAYathri".
I WAS SO GODDAMNED ******* ************djhgfsjf #$%$@#$ ##!$$%#$%#% that I went
berserk in the office and stomped out amid flying debris. I had 10 boyfriends invented out of thin air but that was before I read this :
" I never make the mistake of arguing with people for whose opinions I have no respect" : Edward Gibbon(English Historian)
And when people you have never met end up thinking ill about you. Then. Then you will know what hate is. If you find the person who was responsible for it. !! Or rather if I find that person!!.
Think of this :
You are being invited very graciously to a party. The members at the party(or so you think) are absolutely new people and you are looking forward to meet them and form a new gang. You turn up looking like a fresh lily and some jealous nut comments "She looks like she will steal your boyfriend". Gone are the chances you will ever find a sympathetic let alone an emphathetic listener.
So I sum up, at the risk of being at your opinion's end, You try and get yourselves a opinion on everything in this world. Then. Then. Then you will realise that you are being talked about much and remain the centre of attention.
Otherwise send looks that are daggers across and pray that they are dead and talk about them after that!!!
Have a great day. Week. Month. Whatever. Your choice. Your opinion. I dont care about it!! I really dont. As far as they are against me!!
Vox Populi! Vox Dei!
Welcome to the club Mi Lord!!
Friday, October 20, 2006
The count of Monte Cristo
Long have I been desirous of writing on my favorite book. But loath enough to procrastinate it this long. The book goes by the title of this blog. "The count of monte cristo" by Alexandre Dumas appearing first in French and then translated to English.
When I was a kid, I used to be enamoured of books that spelt out treasure. Be it Enid Blyton where childish treasures were hidden and discovered to the books of pirates, Tom Sawyer, lost gold and refound. Even Tintin has a story wherein Captain Haddock comes off his inheritance though I forgot the title.
This book as I read it abridged as a child of 10 was hardly 80 pages long. But it sufficed my imagination at that period. Punished by fate, rewarded by destiny and riding into the sea's morning calm were all that the book spoke of. But it sustained enough enthusiasm in me to get the book (atleast borrow it) when I was in college and finish it in a frenzy. If there is a book that I like better than any other book in the world, it is this.
Going into a small prelude of the story :
Edmont Dantes is a young sea faring sailor soon to wed his beloved and become the captain of his own ship. Jealousy and ego of the people he calls friends force him into a prison : the most dreaded Chateau d' If. He cultivates a rich friendship with the guy in the next cell :Abbe Faria. They spent 15 years in the prison enriching each other's knowledge. On his death bed the abbe talks of a treasure of which Edmond becoms the master of soon after.
He begins a trip back to his past. Ghosts are revisited and hearts ripped apart. His father is dead. His beloved has married his rival. Everything good has been undone and the criminals flourish.
The story talks of the tale of repaid generosity and vengence the nemesis invokes on his enemies.
You may think that it is really a drama of tamil cinema : villains. Hero punished. Rescued by providence. Rewards good people. Punishes evil ones. Lives happily ever after.
But it is not so and to find why it is not so you GOTTA READ THIS BOOK.
Dumas remains one of my favorite authors for the single fact that the emotions behind his writing forces itself through the pages and into your eyes, soul and mind and makes you emote with the character. Along with the three musketeers, he has created a masterpiece : an epic saga of love, rivalry and vengence that intertwine in melliflous and harsh tones providing the symphony of the highest order.
I belong the old school of writing. My interests span the pre modern era. I dont identify or empathize with the book of today which you read with your mind. Not the heart. It forces you to logicize, reason out and struggle to interpret the author's view and ends open leaving you to make a conclusion.
Here are my favorite lines from the book. Though not the only ones.
""And now," said the unknown, "farewell kindness, humanity, and gratitude! Farewell to all the feelings that expand the heart! I have been heaven's substitute to recompense the good - now the god of vengeance yields to me his power to punish the wicked!""
Uttered by Monte cristo when he turns to play God to his enemies..
Click the title for a link to the book. Have a good read!!
When I was a kid, I used to be enamoured of books that spelt out treasure. Be it Enid Blyton where childish treasures were hidden and discovered to the books of pirates, Tom Sawyer, lost gold and refound. Even Tintin has a story wherein Captain Haddock comes off his inheritance though I forgot the title.
This book as I read it abridged as a child of 10 was hardly 80 pages long. But it sufficed my imagination at that period. Punished by fate, rewarded by destiny and riding into the sea's morning calm were all that the book spoke of. But it sustained enough enthusiasm in me to get the book (atleast borrow it) when I was in college and finish it in a frenzy. If there is a book that I like better than any other book in the world, it is this.
Going into a small prelude of the story :
Edmont Dantes is a young sea faring sailor soon to wed his beloved and become the captain of his own ship. Jealousy and ego of the people he calls friends force him into a prison : the most dreaded Chateau d' If. He cultivates a rich friendship with the guy in the next cell :Abbe Faria. They spent 15 years in the prison enriching each other's knowledge. On his death bed the abbe talks of a treasure of which Edmond becoms the master of soon after.
He begins a trip back to his past. Ghosts are revisited and hearts ripped apart. His father is dead. His beloved has married his rival. Everything good has been undone and the criminals flourish.
The story talks of the tale of repaid generosity and vengence the nemesis invokes on his enemies.
You may think that it is really a drama of tamil cinema : villains. Hero punished. Rescued by providence. Rewards good people. Punishes evil ones. Lives happily ever after.
But it is not so and to find why it is not so you GOTTA READ THIS BOOK.
Dumas remains one of my favorite authors for the single fact that the emotions behind his writing forces itself through the pages and into your eyes, soul and mind and makes you emote with the character. Along with the three musketeers, he has created a masterpiece : an epic saga of love, rivalry and vengence that intertwine in melliflous and harsh tones providing the symphony of the highest order.
I belong the old school of writing. My interests span the pre modern era. I dont identify or empathize with the book of today which you read with your mind. Not the heart. It forces you to logicize, reason out and struggle to interpret the author's view and ends open leaving you to make a conclusion.
Here are my favorite lines from the book. Though not the only ones.
""And now," said the unknown, "farewell kindness, humanity, and gratitude! Farewell to all the feelings that expand the heart! I have been heaven's substitute to recompense the good - now the god of vengeance yields to me his power to punish the wicked!""
Uttered by Monte cristo when he turns to play God to his enemies..
Click the title for a link to the book. Have a good read!!
Monday, October 16, 2006
Has today been weird???
Oh No. Of course not. It has been like any other of my days. Completely zany and bonkers!!!
Was waiting to try on my new time schedule today and started off to bed yesterday by 12:35 PM. I was to have woken up at 6:00 this morning. Go on to make that 7:45!!! With the lightest hint of hangover and nausea. From?? studying last night!!! :))
Man! Does it take a lot to be a graduate student!!. I am not going for my proposed PHD. Am confident of that atleast.
Bleary eyed, knotted with cold : this morning in bed!. Awoke slowly. Opened one eye and reached out a tired hand for the cell phone. Missed calls?? Oh No! It is 7:45!!!!!!!!!!
I just bolted upright and sat up. Add grogginess to the list of maladies. Tottered unsteadily to the restroom and fled!! After taking one look at the mirror. It told me I needed atleast 10 more hours of sleep.
Coffee. Prevented. Prohibited. Threatened with persecution! Ah! The temptation of Eve. Hands stretched for the mug. Coffee in microwave. Me on bed. 8:15. Coffee.. wafting, smelling wonderful, the cold in the air. Coffee. Coffff. Hmm. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Ding! Microwave rang jolting my frame again. Coffee. Ah!! Enthusiasm to face the day. Opened the curtains. It was a crystal clear morning. Awesomely beautiful!!!
After my ablutions, dressed carefully in semiformals(iron-creased) for I had a meeting with my professor. Walked to the department. 9:05. Oh ! Gott in Himmel!! Math class!
Ran straight up the stairs of my classroom building. Head on collisions and hurried apologies later. 9:10 class. Assignment! Sheesh!! Hated my marks. WHATTTT?? A NEW ONE??? slunk away from class("I knew I should have never turned up").
I am nice little girl. So adorable and cute. Ok Ok. I bought a gift for appa so that he will say all these things. I did not send it at all in time for his birthday and now I am getting "You are a procrastinatatatator.. " What ever it means. So I thougt I would get around to sending that and a cheque for Diwali( total scene. Nothing else) Cha Cha!! It is not for my sake. It is for amma's sake for amma has to say "Hamsu bought me sarees for Diwali". Otherwise her mouth wont be doing enough exercises!!
So I went to the post office(Man!! Pagal Kollai adikaranga pa sami) sent the bulky box to India and insured it just for appa's gift and forget the cheque!!! Mailed it and returned to lab.
Rememberedddddddddddd. Ran to the bank hoping for assurance that the cheque cant be encased by anybody else. "Sorry Ma'am. I wish I could tell you that. But no!!!" Aiyo. Raghava!!!
Thalaila adichundu ran back to the post office. "Have you sent my packageeeeeeeeeeeee"??
"Hey baby, what can I do for ya?" dey!!! adi vangatha.. Sollu enga vechu erukaa en parcela??? Dey!!
"Its right here."
After a lot of delibrations, he increased the insurance and the handling fee and I got away.
Opened the mail box. To find. 6 overdue notices from University Libraries!! SIX?? God!!!
Time : 11:45AM. Had a meeting with my professor at 12:00.
Decided that I shall go to the library as soon as possible. 12:00.
Scene : Outside Dr. Rouch's office door
Me: Knocking timidly.
(no response)
Me : Loudly knocking. Knock KnoKnock..no response!!
(trying the door) Locked firmly.
Totally disappointed returned back to the lab! Mopped around and ran to the library. 1/3 of the fines were forgiven for I was working at the library last semester. After paying that off, came to the lab rueing my rapidly falling credit balance.
Mail check! WHAT!! THIS CANT BE HAPPENING!!! SHUT!!!
Mail form the university billing services for a late fee!! I dont believe this.
Ran to the billing services and found that I had not paid my summer fees and so!! If anything else can be worse.
I went to my meet my professor in a total bad mood. Did not brush my astray hair or bother to replace my spectacles on my nose. Just wandered on like a delirect from Andromeda.
Professor : Come in. Good morning. smiles.
Me :(aha. Thapichen!! Thanks Andava!!) Good morning.
Professor: Can I help you with anything?
Me : (Bewildered!!! Aha!! adichayan aappu adichan!!) "sir. you had wanted to discuss my thesis?"
Professor : "Did I offer you a thesis??"
AIYOOOOOOOOOOOOO. All my dreams for financial assistance and thesis vanished into thin smoke(Vayatherichal la air enga nga?? only smoke!)
Me :(painfully reminded him everything from my thesis to assistantship)
Dr.Rouch : Fine. We shall see about that. OK? See you later.
I picked myself painfully and came to the lab and picked at my lunch.
Remembered that I had an on campus job. Since I had nothing better at that moment to do, came on time to the job.
It is not even half a day past. What is going to happen to the other half?? I wonder!!!
Blogged and Buggggggged...
Was waiting to try on my new time schedule today and started off to bed yesterday by 12:35 PM. I was to have woken up at 6:00 this morning. Go on to make that 7:45!!! With the lightest hint of hangover and nausea. From?? studying last night!!! :))
Man! Does it take a lot to be a graduate student!!. I am not going for my proposed PHD. Am confident of that atleast.
Bleary eyed, knotted with cold : this morning in bed!. Awoke slowly. Opened one eye and reached out a tired hand for the cell phone. Missed calls?? Oh No! It is 7:45!!!!!!!!!!
I just bolted upright and sat up. Add grogginess to the list of maladies. Tottered unsteadily to the restroom and fled!! After taking one look at the mirror. It told me I needed atleast 10 more hours of sleep.
Coffee. Prevented. Prohibited. Threatened with persecution! Ah! The temptation of Eve. Hands stretched for the mug. Coffee in microwave. Me on bed. 8:15. Coffee.. wafting, smelling wonderful, the cold in the air. Coffee. Coffff. Hmm. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Ding! Microwave rang jolting my frame again. Coffee. Ah!! Enthusiasm to face the day. Opened the curtains. It was a crystal clear morning. Awesomely beautiful!!!
After my ablutions, dressed carefully in semiformals(iron-creased) for I had a meeting with my professor. Walked to the department. 9:05. Oh ! Gott in Himmel!! Math class!
Ran straight up the stairs of my classroom building. Head on collisions and hurried apologies later. 9:10 class. Assignment! Sheesh!! Hated my marks. WHATTTT?? A NEW ONE??? slunk away from class("I knew I should have never turned up").
I am nice little girl. So adorable and cute. Ok Ok. I bought a gift for appa so that he will say all these things. I did not send it at all in time for his birthday and now I am getting "You are a procrastinatatatator.. " What ever it means. So I thougt I would get around to sending that and a cheque for Diwali( total scene. Nothing else) Cha Cha!! It is not for my sake. It is for amma's sake for amma has to say "Hamsu bought me sarees for Diwali". Otherwise her mouth wont be doing enough exercises!!
So I went to the post office(Man!! Pagal Kollai adikaranga pa sami) sent the bulky box to India and insured it just for appa's gift and forget the cheque!!! Mailed it and returned to lab.
Rememberedddddddddddd. Ran to the bank hoping for assurance that the cheque cant be encased by anybody else. "Sorry Ma'am. I wish I could tell you that. But no!!!" Aiyo. Raghava!!!
Thalaila adichundu ran back to the post office. "Have you sent my packageeeeeeeeeeeee"??
"Hey baby, what can I do for ya?" dey!!! adi vangatha.. Sollu enga vechu erukaa en parcela??? Dey!!
"Its right here."
After a lot of delibrations, he increased the insurance and the handling fee and I got away.
Opened the mail box. To find. 6 overdue notices from University Libraries!! SIX?? God!!!
Time : 11:45AM. Had a meeting with my professor at 12:00.
Decided that I shall go to the library as soon as possible. 12:00.
Scene : Outside Dr. Rouch's office door
Me: Knocking timidly.
(no response)
Me : Loudly knocking. Knock KnoKnock..no response!!
(trying the door) Locked firmly.
Totally disappointed returned back to the lab! Mopped around and ran to the library. 1/3 of the fines were forgiven for I was working at the library last semester. After paying that off, came to the lab rueing my rapidly falling credit balance.
Mail check! WHAT!! THIS CANT BE HAPPENING!!! SHUT!!!
Mail form the university billing services for a late fee!! I dont believe this.
Ran to the billing services and found that I had not paid my summer fees and so!! If anything else can be worse.
I went to my meet my professor in a total bad mood. Did not brush my astray hair or bother to replace my spectacles on my nose. Just wandered on like a delirect from Andromeda.
Professor : Come in. Good morning. smiles.
Me :(aha. Thapichen!! Thanks Andava!!) Good morning.
Professor: Can I help you with anything?
Me : (Bewildered!!! Aha!! adichayan aappu adichan!!) "sir. you had wanted to discuss my thesis?"
Professor : "Did I offer you a thesis??"
AIYOOOOOOOOOOOOO. All my dreams for financial assistance and thesis vanished into thin smoke(Vayatherichal la air enga nga?? only smoke!)
Me :(painfully reminded him everything from my thesis to assistantship)
Dr.Rouch : Fine. We shall see about that. OK? See you later.
I picked myself painfully and came to the lab and picked at my lunch.
Remembered that I had an on campus job. Since I had nothing better at that moment to do, came on time to the job.
It is not even half a day past. What is going to happen to the other half?? I wonder!!!
Blogged and Buggggggged...
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Madurai Malli
The only difference that I feel extremely palpably in living at home in Madras and America is the lack of culture and tradition. Evenings spent in the temple : soothing and retrospective. Moralisations. Tuesdays with morrie mathri "Evenings with God nu oru book e podara level kku experience.
The total lack of flowers!! Man!! I really miss them. Different different kinds of flowers. Malli, Kanambaram,Samandhi, roses, pavala malli, senbagam and a very soft kind of malli called..hmm..forgot. Free!! I loved the last the best. It gave out a scent that was like!! WOW!
I would back from college by 6:30. After freshing up lightly, without any kind of moisturizers or skin cream!! Just plain soap not "fragrance free, soap free, oil free, chemical free"!!! What are they selling ??? water?? Mysore sandal. hmmm.. Heaven!!!
Walk lightly slippered(chappaled) to the street shop two lanes away.
"Vaa maa. eppdi eruka? enna nethu varave illa? unnakaga scendu eduthuvechuerunthen!!""
The easy familiarity of the person who knows you, has been selling you stuff and that "personalised attention".. Not the celluloid reproduction of the smile barely touching the eyes..
"Illa college the vela jasthi. Rendu mozham thanga. Moona cut panni"..smile. Thanks.
The total lack of flowers!! Man!! I really miss them. Different different kinds of flowers. Malli, Kanambaram,Samandhi, roses, pavala malli, senbagam and a very soft kind of malli called..hmm..forgot. Free!! I loved the last the best. It gave out a scent that was like!! WOW!
I would back from college by 6:30. After freshing up lightly, without any kind of moisturizers or skin cream!! Just plain soap not "fragrance free, soap free, oil free, chemical free"!!! What are they selling ??? water?? Mysore sandal. hmmm.. Heaven!!!
Walk lightly slippered(chappaled) to the street shop two lanes away.
"Vaa maa. eppdi eruka? enna nethu varave illa? unnakaga scendu eduthuvechuerunthen!!""
The easy familiarity of the person who knows you, has been selling you stuff and that "personalised attention".. Not the celluloid reproduction of the smile barely touching the eyes..
"Illa college the vela jasthi. Rendu mozham thanga. Moona cut panni"..smile. Thanks.
"appa varuva. avar kodupar ma. nee po"
My idea of a pleasant and happy conversation with a vendor I am absolutely comfortable. Not like walmart. 1000 stalks of malli joined to together. Cut at will. I hate uniformity.!!!
Mozham alllakarthulernthu, kokara vitham varaikum ellame different. Each vendor, his stalls, the arrangement. Especially near the temple. "Malli poovum kooda inga meen vasam veesum" -there are areas like this. Zambazar. Hate it though.
After buying the flowers, arranging them on the hair. Leaving it long, folding it to adorn near the ears. Pulling out a strand of hair from the otherwise neat plait to tuck in a strand of jasmine without hairpins.
Usually after 2 hours flowers like jathi and light malli fade away. But "scendu" or closely packed malli does not even for 2 days. Patti used to remove the flowers from hair and secret it in a polythene bag and place it in the fridge.
Trivia : you should never wrap flowers in vazha ilai(banana leaf) for it conducts heat much faster and the flowers will fade.
Even in madras, there are places where you just dont get good flowers. Like Adyar, Besant Nagar, Anna Nagar..these places are too posh for the common malli to thrive. But Thiruvallikeni, Mylapore and Town are the best places for flowers.
All my illusions about jasmine was put to rest when I went to Madurai. Legendary is the Madurai Malli and man!!! Asandhe ponen. flowers are dealt out by the thousands. Not by mozham. They call it "cher" and there is "padi" alavu for it. A cher contains this many thousand/hundred flowers. Even when they are strung into strands, they are given by "1000 poo". Wow.
The night after the flowers have been removed. Man!! My pillow smells of Jasmine and my hair in the morning is divine. My head reeks of Pantene and Garnier here. Back home amma did not allow any of this filth to touch my hair. It is used to be Shikakai, sambrani and malli poo.
Every time, I heard the dialogue from Thiruvilayadal "Is the women's hair naturally scented?", I cant but exclaim and say! "Not at all. It is due to the flowers that lend their lives to decorate the hair.
A divine endnote from Kurai Ondrum Illai - Mokoor Lakshmi Narasingar
There are 3 types of flowers : 1. Those which are kept for "Mangalakaramana" purposes(auspicious like weddings, decoration(of humans ofcourse).
2. Those which are unfortunate to be born for "asantharpas"(death)
3.Those that go to the Lotus feet of the Lord.(Prayer)
Of all these, the last are the most lucky as they not only reach the Feet in their small lives and live with Him forever but also because they carry the heart of the devotee to the Lord and their time in appraising the situation of the hands that held them.
The best form of worship to the Lord is not gold, not money but the mere offering of flowers. The poorest of devotees can do it. The Lord reveals that the only flower that He shall not be worshipped with is that that harms His devotee's fingers.
So pray. Worship. Celebrate with flowers.
Those in India buy a strand and decorate even your vogue hairstyle. Husbands, get flowers for wives. Wives :wear them and make husbands happy. Devotees :Flood your Lord with flowers and get all that you wish.
A Flowery Adieu!!
Friday, October 13, 2006
annai +angusam = 680$
No. It is not a lamentation of self pity. Kavalaye padatheenga. Matter enna moonu perukku birthday. Enn annakku ennum just a month away!! Aiyo na enna panna poren!!
All this confusion to hit on a birthday gift. Antha naal ellam nenacchu patha! aha!! etho periyava kalla vizunthu asirwadam vanguva. Rendu palli mittaiya kaila koduthutu escape! At the most oru kitkat vangi kodutha pulaganitham than ponga!!
En thatha veetku than na first poven en birthday na. My granpa used to live just 4 streets away. Get up in the morning, kulichutu, pattu pavadai potuntu escape agiduven en maternal grandfather veetku.
school school nu onnu eruke nu neenga nenacha :athu enn thapu kedaiyathu. Atha na en saar nenaika poren.!! Straight, falling dwn, getting up, skip along the road to patti aam. yen? ellam kasta pattu kizha position la vizunthu sevichathu appuram kedaikara 10 Rs note kaga!!
Atha na oru nimisham kooda pathu eruka matten. En mama vanthu kozhanthelkku ethukku kasu nu athula chocolate +ice cream vangindu vanthuduva : athana perukkum!!!
Kadila erupen!! enanga? after all kutti kozhanda thane? Paropakaram Itham Shareeram nu dialogue vidara vayasa athu??
sari matterkku varuvom. Enna na. To buy or not to buy! How to answer this question? Poranthutome nu varutha padaravalukku best gist paralogathukku oru travel package. All expense paid. Enga Birthday celebrate panna matten! Ethu enna western style celebrations : dham dhoom nu kothikaravalukku sariyana gift nachu nu oru kuttu! Appuram ezunthurkave koodathu!!!
Sari sari. en polambal oru side erukatum. Enga anna birthday kku oru nalla I pod vangi tharalamenu kelambinen. I am not a technology geek. sathiyama illa. Ennaku ipod na enna nu kooda oru 3 masathukku munnala varaikkum theriyathu. Appuram en friend car la pathu jollu vitta gynabagam than first recollection.
So me trips to ipod store. And then trips over the price range!! arande ponen saar!! arand ponen! Ithu enna manushan vikkara velaina vikkarthu.. Sari ennomo po. ore annan. Vangalame nu pona : 30 GB, 20 GB nu thitaranga. sari thaniya pora kada illa ithu. ellam adults only a erukku nu ennaku therinja oru geek a kootikittu ponen.
After all delibrations(lasting oru 2 hours), he recommends a 20 GB, non video ipod. Me is ready to throw down the towel and escapeeeeee. Ana bill counter kku poi panantha kodutha than nu sonna vudana, poi oru sales rep kitta(sathiyama saar :athu varaikkum avar pakka vanthavur nu nenachu antha pakkame pola),sema accent la, "Hi,(thevaiye illatha) How u doing? fine. thanks. Could you show me a 20 GB non video ipod??"
"sari ma'am. company no longer produces"...apdinane!! Dey yavan da anga!! edura en aruvala. seevi pudaren seevi nu kelambiten!!! en friend konjam americanized. Aiyo amma. nu kathitu kadai vuttu jootu." me in tow.!!!
cha!! ennada epdi agipoche. nu varutha pattu. sari parava illa. poi oru 30 GB ipode vangidalam nu nadanthu ponnen(thirupi un kooda vara matten enna vuttu oditan).
"sir, Could you show me the latest model of ipod 30 GB. yes. I would prefer black. Thanks."
WOW!! awesome a eruke. enga anna voda mughatha imagine panni credit carda eduthen.
"would you like to see our new surround boom box?? Here. I will play it for you.".. aha!!
"we have also special noise cancellation headphones. No. we shall not replace it with what comes with ipod". -- aha aha!!!
"Do you also want to see our new car package for ipod?" --aha!! silku kooda apdi valanjathu illinga!!!
"Do you exercise?" thoda. patha therla illa nu. "actually trying to get into the habit"
"you know what, ipod has helped lot of people in exercising their way to health"..dey!1 enna poo suthariya?
"Wait till you see our new arm band for ipod".. aiyo!! eppo thanga bayame vanthuthu.
soopera than eruku ana!!
"Of course, I think you would not like to leave out on the protective case for ipod". AIYO!!
"If you think that your ipod is very valuable, why dont you go in for the protection plan?"-- dey ennake insurance kedaiyathu da!!!
mothathula antha kadaila ipod oru kadavul. sorry Kadavul. Varam kekkara kadavul!! ennatha solli ponga..
ana enna oru nappasaina, namba vootu pakkam "annai vangina angusam free"...nu solvangale enga epdi nu pathen!!
annaikku mela eruku angusam!!!
Ennamo therila ponga! Onnu patha atha mattum vangitu varuvom garthe kedaiyathu!!! Mathatha pathathukku appuram onna mattum vanga manasum varathu!!! Cha!!!
Atha vida enna na vootku vanthathukku appuram, polambum pothu moralisation vera.
"Hamsa, Thirupavaikku oru variliyum artham sollalam. Ayiram variliyum sollalam nu solluviye! nee vangi erukarthu oru vari than. nana erunthena bose speakers kku opt panni erupen.."
Dey! eduda eduda. Entha oorlenthu vanthu erukomgartha kamichupuduvom!!. aruvala(knife) eduthu kannukulla vidara level ponathu appurama : positions reverse...
Na ethuvume vanagala nu therinjavudan..
Koothu nadantha edam : Austin....koothadithavargal : Hamsa & Navy...
All this confusion to hit on a birthday gift. Antha naal ellam nenacchu patha! aha!! etho periyava kalla vizunthu asirwadam vanguva. Rendu palli mittaiya kaila koduthutu escape! At the most oru kitkat vangi kodutha pulaganitham than ponga!!
En thatha veetku than na first poven en birthday na. My granpa used to live just 4 streets away. Get up in the morning, kulichutu, pattu pavadai potuntu escape agiduven en maternal grandfather veetku.
school school nu onnu eruke nu neenga nenacha :athu enn thapu kedaiyathu. Atha na en saar nenaika poren.!! Straight, falling dwn, getting up, skip along the road to patti aam. yen? ellam kasta pattu kizha position la vizunthu sevichathu appuram kedaikara 10 Rs note kaga!!
Atha na oru nimisham kooda pathu eruka matten. En mama vanthu kozhanthelkku ethukku kasu nu athula chocolate +ice cream vangindu vanthuduva : athana perukkum!!!
Kadila erupen!! enanga? after all kutti kozhanda thane? Paropakaram Itham Shareeram nu dialogue vidara vayasa athu??
sari matterkku varuvom. Enna na. To buy or not to buy! How to answer this question? Poranthutome nu varutha padaravalukku best gist paralogathukku oru travel package. All expense paid. Enga Birthday celebrate panna matten! Ethu enna western style celebrations : dham dhoom nu kothikaravalukku sariyana gift nachu nu oru kuttu! Appuram ezunthurkave koodathu!!!
Sari sari. en polambal oru side erukatum. Enga anna birthday kku oru nalla I pod vangi tharalamenu kelambinen. I am not a technology geek. sathiyama illa. Ennaku ipod na enna nu kooda oru 3 masathukku munnala varaikkum theriyathu. Appuram en friend car la pathu jollu vitta gynabagam than first recollection.
So me trips to ipod store. And then trips over the price range!! arande ponen saar!! arand ponen! Ithu enna manushan vikkara velaina vikkarthu.. Sari ennomo po. ore annan. Vangalame nu pona : 30 GB, 20 GB nu thitaranga. sari thaniya pora kada illa ithu. ellam adults only a erukku nu ennaku therinja oru geek a kootikittu ponen.
After all delibrations(lasting oru 2 hours), he recommends a 20 GB, non video ipod. Me is ready to throw down the towel and escapeeeeee. Ana bill counter kku poi panantha kodutha than nu sonna vudana, poi oru sales rep kitta(sathiyama saar :athu varaikkum avar pakka vanthavur nu nenachu antha pakkame pola),sema accent la, "Hi,(thevaiye illatha) How u doing? fine. thanks. Could you show me a 20 GB non video ipod??"
"sari ma'am. company no longer produces"...apdinane!! Dey yavan da anga!! edura en aruvala. seevi pudaren seevi nu kelambiten!!! en friend konjam americanized. Aiyo amma. nu kathitu kadai vuttu jootu." me in tow.!!!
cha!! ennada epdi agipoche. nu varutha pattu. sari parava illa. poi oru 30 GB ipode vangidalam nu nadanthu ponnen(thirupi un kooda vara matten enna vuttu oditan).
"sir, Could you show me the latest model of ipod 30 GB. yes. I would prefer black. Thanks."
WOW!! awesome a eruke. enga anna voda mughatha imagine panni credit carda eduthen.
"would you like to see our new surround boom box?? Here. I will play it for you.".. aha!!
"we have also special noise cancellation headphones. No. we shall not replace it with what comes with ipod". -- aha aha!!!
"Do you also want to see our new car package for ipod?" --aha!! silku kooda apdi valanjathu illinga!!!
"Do you exercise?" thoda. patha therla illa nu. "actually trying to get into the habit"
"you know what, ipod has helped lot of people in exercising their way to health"..dey!1 enna poo suthariya?
"Wait till you see our new arm band for ipod".. aiyo!! eppo thanga bayame vanthuthu.
soopera than eruku ana!!
"Of course, I think you would not like to leave out on the protective case for ipod". AIYO!!
"If you think that your ipod is very valuable, why dont you go in for the protection plan?"-- dey ennake insurance kedaiyathu da!!!
mothathula antha kadaila ipod oru kadavul. sorry Kadavul. Varam kekkara kadavul!! ennatha solli ponga..
ana enna oru nappasaina, namba vootu pakkam "annai vangina angusam free"...nu solvangale enga epdi nu pathen!!
annaikku mela eruku angusam!!!
Ennamo therila ponga! Onnu patha atha mattum vangitu varuvom garthe kedaiyathu!!! Mathatha pathathukku appuram onna mattum vanga manasum varathu!!! Cha!!!
Atha vida enna na vootku vanthathukku appuram, polambum pothu moralisation vera.
"Hamsa, Thirupavaikku oru variliyum artham sollalam. Ayiram variliyum sollalam nu solluviye! nee vangi erukarthu oru vari than. nana erunthena bose speakers kku opt panni erupen.."
Dey! eduda eduda. Entha oorlenthu vanthu erukomgartha kamichupuduvom!!. aruvala(knife) eduthu kannukulla vidara level ponathu appurama : positions reverse...
Na ethuvume vanagala nu therinjavudan..
Koothu nadantha edam : Austin....koothadithavargal : Hamsa & Navy...
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Aha!!
Dhemenu controls systems assignment poda vantha enna!!!
Eppidi blog poda vechutanya Venchutan.
Neenga mela pakkara padam MIO lernthu sutathu. Kalyana mandapame vechuerukar saar!! ayiram "balcany" vechu amsam a voodu keethu. Athula illatha sayal ellam evaga edupula than keethu pola!!
ennamo ponga!! Naat nadape sarila..
Pathu sainga saar, Aatchi sanchuda povuthu!!!
Dinner and the demon in me.
I think I am extremely sensitive. I come across maybe at first sight a dont care attitude person. But I know that I am extremely not so. I get hurt very easily and everything just seems to happen so for me.
When I ever I do something with the greatest of enthusiasms..I am dropped like a dish of hot potatoes..
My friend drives home from Newyork. I cook him food..Greatest of care. four hours.. of carfeul preparations. When the moment comes, "thanks di but I dont eat hot stuff" -- reaction as dead as a mackeral on my neighbour's plate.
Somebody says at a party in Austin on New year's day," you have never cooked for me. can you do so tomorrow??"
I cook for him. Again after a 3 o clock bash. Get up and cook for unfeeling idiots. He comes in at 12:15 for a 1:00 flight and rushes through lunch like a bull at a red cloth.
What about today??? I cook dinner for two of my friends and the all the reaction they can muster is " hmmm.".
It is not that I am bad cook. I get to eat what I cook and I know it is good. Maybe today it was slightly like mushy. For they were impatient to eat and I did not wait till my masterpiece was done!!! :) :) :)
I am very quick to anger and hurt. I give everything I have to my friends. Anything. Everything. I dont even expect the same from them. I used to. But I stopped for I knew that unconditional love is just one sided. But when I cant even seem to get a quantum of affection from my closest friends.
Today I was left thinking. I have never cooked for my parents. Nothing for my 2 friends back home. Nothing. And Here I come to America and cook for all Tom, Dick and Harry..For nothing in return.
I am never going to invite anybody for lunch, dinner or breakfast henceforth!!! So all those who are reading this: You may come to Lexington but dont come to my house for food. For in all probability I shall throw you out!!!
(Horns, tail, black costume, red eyes!!!)
When I ever I do something with the greatest of enthusiasms..I am dropped like a dish of hot potatoes..
My friend drives home from Newyork. I cook him food..Greatest of care. four hours.. of carfeul preparations. When the moment comes, "thanks di but I dont eat hot stuff" -- reaction as dead as a mackeral on my neighbour's plate.
Somebody says at a party in Austin on New year's day," you have never cooked for me. can you do so tomorrow??"
I cook for him. Again after a 3 o clock bash. Get up and cook for unfeeling idiots. He comes in at 12:15 for a 1:00 flight and rushes through lunch like a bull at a red cloth.
What about today??? I cook dinner for two of my friends and the all the reaction they can muster is " hmmm.".
It is not that I am bad cook. I get to eat what I cook and I know it is good. Maybe today it was slightly like mushy. For they were impatient to eat and I did not wait till my masterpiece was done!!! :) :) :)
I am very quick to anger and hurt. I give everything I have to my friends. Anything. Everything. I dont even expect the same from them. I used to. But I stopped for I knew that unconditional love is just one sided. But when I cant even seem to get a quantum of affection from my closest friends.
Today I was left thinking. I have never cooked for my parents. Nothing for my 2 friends back home. Nothing. And Here I come to America and cook for all Tom, Dick and Harry..For nothing in return.
I am never going to invite anybody for lunch, dinner or breakfast henceforth!!! So all those who are reading this: You may come to Lexington but dont come to my house for food. For in all probability I shall throw you out!!!
(Horns, tail, black costume, red eyes!!!)
Monday, October 09, 2006
Nithyam Achutha!!!!!
Intha vazhka anithyam nu namba ellarukkume theriyum. Ana maranam ngra pidi namma kitta nerungum pothu enna bayam erukum nu yaravathu solla mudiyuma??? yes. mudiyum. people who has survied through it or people who feel they are on the throes of death.
Eppo en kitta kelunga, na solren.
Manasukku adila oru verumai. Cha!! Entha vazhkangra gift a namba epdi thooki potutome. Oru Einstein, Newton na illainallum Hamsadhwani ya, Gayathri ya santhoshamana vazhkaiya vittutu..epdi thevai illatha kastangalaiyum, virakthigalaiyum, manasula vechundu!! How many spoilt relations. How many friendships broken, How many loves lost...due to the good for nothing ego! The hours and hours before the mirror. The feeling that pride goeth before a fall!!!
The books left unread, the songs left unsung, the dances, the innumerable threads that were lost and never searched for again..
All the mistakes that you have done runs into full view before your eyes. Your heart takes over the brain. Tears fall unashamedly. Realisation that everything could have been said right that had been said wrong. Past mistakes and Punishments repented for with full heart.
Thankfullness for having lead a good life till now : True friends. Unsaid love. Life. Beauty. Creation...Joys of things missed. Sex.
God : your mind starts contemplating about the Lord above and what explanations your going to offer for your deeds. Good or Bad. Of the friendships that you broke where a forgiving glance might have meant life to somebody. Where you simply chose to ignore and shut your heart out.
More than ever. The thinking of how if you are given another stint at it : what would you choose to do with it??? State first? Scientist? Never leave India. Mom and dad. More more more friends, happiness, zero ego, less money, contented life (you have just realised that you dont need money to be alive!!! or money cant make you live after you died.)
Tears. Tears.. Tears.
Happy, sad, nostalgic, penitent, ecstastic.
It is not a nic feeling to know that you are dying. I can promise you that.
Now. To the question that has been topmost in your minds. Why should I write this?
It is a promise I made to myself. Whatever I had done, maybe there isnt enough time to undo it. It has been a long day..23 years of life. Total summer. Maybe my winter has come already.
I am going to meet the doctor tomorrow regarding a persistent pain in my chest. I think I feel a lump. Maybe I am paranoid. Maybe I am correct.
Tomorrow shall be the test.
Will I remain Hamsadhwani? Or shall I pass away as an indistinct blur on the sea of humanity??
Oh Lord in Heaven,
"Whenever I prayed, I said, "Lord. Let me see you. Be near you. Take me away from this cruel earth. "
But Now when my time comes, I'd rather remain on the earth. Close to amma and appa. Close to my friends, and You. In the temple."
Eppo en kitta kelunga, na solren.
Manasukku adila oru verumai. Cha!! Entha vazhkangra gift a namba epdi thooki potutome. Oru Einstein, Newton na illainallum Hamsadhwani ya, Gayathri ya santhoshamana vazhkaiya vittutu..epdi thevai illatha kastangalaiyum, virakthigalaiyum, manasula vechundu!! How many spoilt relations. How many friendships broken, How many loves lost...due to the good for nothing ego! The hours and hours before the mirror. The feeling that pride goeth before a fall!!!
The books left unread, the songs left unsung, the dances, the innumerable threads that were lost and never searched for again..
All the mistakes that you have done runs into full view before your eyes. Your heart takes over the brain. Tears fall unashamedly. Realisation that everything could have been said right that had been said wrong. Past mistakes and Punishments repented for with full heart.
Thankfullness for having lead a good life till now : True friends. Unsaid love. Life. Beauty. Creation...Joys of things missed. Sex.
God : your mind starts contemplating about the Lord above and what explanations your going to offer for your deeds. Good or Bad. Of the friendships that you broke where a forgiving glance might have meant life to somebody. Where you simply chose to ignore and shut your heart out.
More than ever. The thinking of how if you are given another stint at it : what would you choose to do with it??? State first? Scientist? Never leave India. Mom and dad. More more more friends, happiness, zero ego, less money, contented life (you have just realised that you dont need money to be alive!!! or money cant make you live after you died.)
Tears. Tears.. Tears.
Happy, sad, nostalgic, penitent, ecstastic.
It is not a nic feeling to know that you are dying. I can promise you that.
Now. To the question that has been topmost in your minds. Why should I write this?
It is a promise I made to myself. Whatever I had done, maybe there isnt enough time to undo it. It has been a long day..23 years of life. Total summer. Maybe my winter has come already.
I am going to meet the doctor tomorrow regarding a persistent pain in my chest. I think I feel a lump. Maybe I am paranoid. Maybe I am correct.
Tomorrow shall be the test.
Will I remain Hamsadhwani? Or shall I pass away as an indistinct blur on the sea of humanity??
Oh Lord in Heaven,
"Whenever I prayed, I said, "Lord. Let me see you. Be near you. Take me away from this cruel earth. "
But Now when my time comes, I'd rather remain on the earth. Close to amma and appa. Close to my friends, and You. In the temple."
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Pluto et moi..
This post was very very long in coming. I had written this long ago but never gave a thought it!!! Then it became that I lost the status of being a friend to somebody.. This was an outlet.
DISCLAIMER : NOTHING MEANT TO HURT ANYONE. PURE PURE FUN!!!
It was sometime last month. I had been summoned away by a very personal call. It was purely a lamentation of deprivation. This guy was totally gonkers in my voice mail and I could feel my hand twisted by fate. I knew when I set out where my final destination would be!!
I got into my all new ever so secret "Mloops". The latest ever in space travel. It uses the M' aaspathri rule in breaking out of the earth's gravity and reaching higher speeds than light by asking light to turn around and then running past before it can react.
So dont disclose this to anybody.!!! Please. I have been telling everybody that Mloops is my latest laser control can opener. It can open cans in a radius of 5 kms by the Left Leg wine pour rule. The rule which formulates how a human leg wobbles after a nightcap. Oh!! You already know about it. It was just published in the "Young engineers garble".
So. I get into my Mloops. I am secretly watched by the "Society of Velai ella Pattatharigal", the american society founded by the Early Dr. Crow Rouser. Who gets the patents for anything undiscovered and releases it as soon as it is discovered.
My heart does a neat somersault as my Mloops takes off on a mission to : Pluto!!. If you had'nt guessed it already.
Now Pluto was my high school senior in the "Intergalactic Commission for underage delinquents". We had been commissioned for stealing the blueprints of how to make a pie from Gayathri's mom in a primitive planet called earth. Believe me!!! Gayathri's mom's vetha kozhambhu tastes a lot better than the pie we tried making..
Oh!! You thought I was from earth? How so dumb!! I am "Hi, am Metamorphising Service (for )Anthropods", code named Hamsa from the andromeda galaxy to study the primitive beahviour of select individuals in Lexington, Earth and try changing them into evolved beings.
Oh!! God. To think I was pardoned and trained for so insipid a task.
Any How!! Back to the story. So Pluto called me and asked me to rush to his place in the Solar system. It took Mloops exactly 10 tetronics to reach Pluto. This is akin to 60 minutes in earth. I was travelling from Celeron where I was temporarily receiving training in "Sahasranamam" which these individuals seem to attach so much importance. And also there was one constantly badgering me about "Shastras and stuff" I hardly got into my hypothalamus. I was hoping for a quick hard disk transfer from K Book which had done extensive study of the early religions. I also hoped to stop @ Vyasa's house @ Shri Vaikuntam on the galactic highway to hear a first hand account of how to handle crap. So you can naturally imagine my mortification at being interuppted.
I went to pluto's place and searched for a parking shelter for Mloops. Now Pluto being a very experimentative youngster had meddled around with blow up swell gas and had swollen to much that his experiment station was detected from primitive telescopic evidence. By people who cant see beyond their own noses. They had regaled him into status of being the youngest planet in the solar system. Now terms like "plutonic"--blown up, pluto-blue blooded and ice cold.. everything sprung up and my dear friend was swelled up again with self importance. His ego was doing rounds about the solar system.
Then came the big bang. He was suddenly was relegated to the status of stary debris and his world came braking down on him and had invoked my number. His orbit had also slowed down.
I went to the spot to talk him out of his depression and talk him to walking to the earth and having a good laugh. It has been long since I met a truly intelligent person. So it went.
I had reached pluto and parked in his palm. Man!! Had He swollen. He looked like a small dwarf planet actually!! To think earthlings could be right about something!!!.
Me: Pluto, come. Put a brake to it. Walk with me outside the kuiper belt and see Andromeda. We have left everything to come here. To be first praised and then demoted cruelly.
Pluto : sobs controllably.
Me : I cant even try to put my hand around you!!! (consternation)
Pluto : I stopped working on anti swell pills when they declared me a planet. Me actually having a reference in the Universe!!! Do you know how difficult it is to be fat!!!
Me :Yeah! I do. These earthlings are obsessed with it. though not in a call as large as yours. !!!
Pluto : Hmm??
Me : They decrease and increase in periodic time intervals. Work into depression when they become what they call by an uncouth term "fat". Then work their butts off to become undernourished!!!
Pluto : (peevishly) : I did not call to speak about your troubles. Did you see my moon??? She is so disgusted with me that I am not a planet any more and is wondering whether to take with Neptune!!!
Me: Ah!! Moons!! They are so fickle and impermanent. We have them back in earth. Both on ground and in air!! People worry about moons!!! Dont give two hoots to what they say!!
Pluto : Why does it ever have to happen with me??? Come on.."Hi am.."
Me: stop stop stop.. even I cant hear myself called that. Call me Hamsa.
Pluto : Hamsa? Nice. (Brightens up for the moment). Do u remember that I was hung up on you in IGCUG ??
Me: Pluto. Please. I am just out of an depression. Dont go over taking me into your state.
Pluto : Sorry Hamsa. Was it the guy who was named like a discus?? "spear thrower or something".
Me : PLUTO!! I CONFIDED IN YOU. NOW SHUT UP.
Pluto: Sobs uncontrollably.
Me : I know. I know. It is so difficult to have solar system out of your guts. But still you will have a better future away from it. Dont mingle with planetns that avoid you. Please Pluto.
Pluto : I had so much trust. So much confidence. I gave up my handsome body. I became pluto. No one talked with me!! Hamsa.(pronouncing with andromedan accent).. Hamsa..
Me : Holding up a kerchief.
Pluto : I so much want to lean on your shoulder.
Me : Stepping back!! "No No"
Pluto : (Wiping his tears offf). Ok. I shall stop. Suddenly comes to a screeching halllltttttttttt.
(Me and Mloops swept away by G - Forces from Neptune) Plutooooooooooooooooooooo
Pluto : Hamsa Hamsa....
Me : Mloopsssssssssssssss( Mloops is voice activated. In space?? It is triggered by the movements of my throat muscles.)
Just as we are being pulled in to neptune's cruel orbit, Mloops gets me and we reach Pluto in a tetronic.
Pluto : sorry. Sorry.
Me : Life is never dull around you Pluto.
Pluto: Smiles brightly. You were the best counsellor back home. Yeah. You are right. Than to take up "with not your planets", identity crisis, stolen forms.. All for a few moments of borrowed sunshine??
Me : Nodding head philospohically.
Pluto : You are right!! I am going back home. I will get to Andromeda and give you a call buddy. I shall call you in exactly 100 tetronics. You headed homewards???
Me : me? I have three homes.. To which do I go!!.. My foster parents in India, Earth, My adopted America? Or back home?? Whither lies home!! Home--commiserating miserably..
Pluto : Noooooooooooo.. Not againnnnnnnnnnnnnnn..
Byeeeeeeeeeee
So that ended our conversation and I got into Mloops and did a small sweep of the solar system. It was raining in Jupiter. Stopped over and had a coffee at Suckbtars. And headed home.
Home? I wonder...
DISCLAIMER : NOTHING MEANT TO HURT ANYONE. PURE PURE FUN!!!
It was sometime last month. I had been summoned away by a very personal call. It was purely a lamentation of deprivation. This guy was totally gonkers in my voice mail and I could feel my hand twisted by fate. I knew when I set out where my final destination would be!!
I got into my all new ever so secret "Mloops". The latest ever in space travel. It uses the M' aaspathri rule in breaking out of the earth's gravity and reaching higher speeds than light by asking light to turn around and then running past before it can react.
So dont disclose this to anybody.!!! Please. I have been telling everybody that Mloops is my latest laser control can opener. It can open cans in a radius of 5 kms by the Left Leg wine pour rule. The rule which formulates how a human leg wobbles after a nightcap. Oh!! You already know about it. It was just published in the "Young engineers garble".
So. I get into my Mloops. I am secretly watched by the "Society of Velai ella Pattatharigal", the american society founded by the Early Dr. Crow Rouser. Who gets the patents for anything undiscovered and releases it as soon as it is discovered.
My heart does a neat somersault as my Mloops takes off on a mission to : Pluto!!. If you had'nt guessed it already.
Now Pluto was my high school senior in the "Intergalactic Commission for underage delinquents". We had been commissioned for stealing the blueprints of how to make a pie from Gayathri's mom in a primitive planet called earth. Believe me!!! Gayathri's mom's vetha kozhambhu tastes a lot better than the pie we tried making..
Oh!! You thought I was from earth? How so dumb!! I am "Hi, am Metamorphising Service (for )Anthropods", code named Hamsa from the andromeda galaxy to study the primitive beahviour of select individuals in Lexington, Earth and try changing them into evolved beings.
Oh!! God. To think I was pardoned and trained for so insipid a task.
Any How!! Back to the story. So Pluto called me and asked me to rush to his place in the Solar system. It took Mloops exactly 10 tetronics to reach Pluto. This is akin to 60 minutes in earth. I was travelling from Celeron where I was temporarily receiving training in "Sahasranamam" which these individuals seem to attach so much importance. And also there was one constantly badgering me about "Shastras and stuff" I hardly got into my hypothalamus. I was hoping for a quick hard disk transfer from K Book which had done extensive study of the early religions. I also hoped to stop @ Vyasa's house @ Shri Vaikuntam on the galactic highway to hear a first hand account of how to handle crap. So you can naturally imagine my mortification at being interuppted.
I went to pluto's place and searched for a parking shelter for Mloops. Now Pluto being a very experimentative youngster had meddled around with blow up swell gas and had swollen to much that his experiment station was detected from primitive telescopic evidence. By people who cant see beyond their own noses. They had regaled him into status of being the youngest planet in the solar system. Now terms like "plutonic"--blown up, pluto-blue blooded and ice cold.. everything sprung up and my dear friend was swelled up again with self importance. His ego was doing rounds about the solar system.
Then came the big bang. He was suddenly was relegated to the status of stary debris and his world came braking down on him and had invoked my number. His orbit had also slowed down.
I went to the spot to talk him out of his depression and talk him to walking to the earth and having a good laugh. It has been long since I met a truly intelligent person. So it went.
I had reached pluto and parked in his palm. Man!! Had He swollen. He looked like a small dwarf planet actually!! To think earthlings could be right about something!!!.
Me: Pluto, come. Put a brake to it. Walk with me outside the kuiper belt and see Andromeda. We have left everything to come here. To be first praised and then demoted cruelly.
Pluto : sobs controllably.
Me : I cant even try to put my hand around you!!! (consternation)
Pluto : I stopped working on anti swell pills when they declared me a planet. Me actually having a reference in the Universe!!! Do you know how difficult it is to be fat!!!
Me :Yeah! I do. These earthlings are obsessed with it. though not in a call as large as yours. !!!
Pluto : Hmm??
Me : They decrease and increase in periodic time intervals. Work into depression when they become what they call by an uncouth term "fat". Then work their butts off to become undernourished!!!
Pluto : (peevishly) : I did not call to speak about your troubles. Did you see my moon??? She is so disgusted with me that I am not a planet any more and is wondering whether to take with Neptune!!!
Me: Ah!! Moons!! They are so fickle and impermanent. We have them back in earth. Both on ground and in air!! People worry about moons!!! Dont give two hoots to what they say!!
Pluto : Why does it ever have to happen with me??? Come on.."Hi am.."
Me: stop stop stop.. even I cant hear myself called that. Call me Hamsa.
Pluto : Hamsa? Nice. (Brightens up for the moment). Do u remember that I was hung up on you in IGCUG ??
Me: Pluto. Please. I am just out of an depression. Dont go over taking me into your state.
Pluto : Sorry Hamsa. Was it the guy who was named like a discus?? "spear thrower or something".
Me : PLUTO!! I CONFIDED IN YOU. NOW SHUT UP.
Pluto: Sobs uncontrollably.
Me : I know. I know. It is so difficult to have solar system out of your guts. But still you will have a better future away from it. Dont mingle with planetns that avoid you. Please Pluto.
Pluto : I had so much trust. So much confidence. I gave up my handsome body. I became pluto. No one talked with me!! Hamsa.(pronouncing with andromedan accent).. Hamsa..
Me : Holding up a kerchief.
Pluto : I so much want to lean on your shoulder.
Me : Stepping back!! "No No"
Pluto : (Wiping his tears offf). Ok. I shall stop. Suddenly comes to a screeching halllltttttttttt.
(Me and Mloops swept away by G - Forces from Neptune) Plutooooooooooooooooooooo
Pluto : Hamsa Hamsa....
Me : Mloopsssssssssssssss( Mloops is voice activated. In space?? It is triggered by the movements of my throat muscles.)
Just as we are being pulled in to neptune's cruel orbit, Mloops gets me and we reach Pluto in a tetronic.
Pluto : sorry. Sorry.
Me : Life is never dull around you Pluto.
Pluto: Smiles brightly. You were the best counsellor back home. Yeah. You are right. Than to take up "with not your planets", identity crisis, stolen forms.. All for a few moments of borrowed sunshine??
Me : Nodding head philospohically.
Pluto : You are right!! I am going back home. I will get to Andromeda and give you a call buddy. I shall call you in exactly 100 tetronics. You headed homewards???
Me : me? I have three homes.. To which do I go!!.. My foster parents in India, Earth, My adopted America? Or back home?? Whither lies home!! Home--commiserating miserably..
Pluto : Noooooooooooo.. Not againnnnnnnnnnnnnnn..
Byeeeeeeeeeee
So that ended our conversation and I got into Mloops and did a small sweep of the solar system. It was raining in Jupiter. Stopped over and had a coffee at Suckbtars. And headed home.
Home? I wonder...
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