Hmm. The way the cookie crumbles

As I work on my machine design concepts, I feel a gentle nudge from my heart. Blogs. My hand creeps towards the system. My fingers itch to type out:-------.blogspot.com. I think it is just an obsessive complaint as it was with orkut.

I have always had a compulsion to write out my thoughts. When I was at Wheels India, I communicated the layout of the section I was planning to change through email. He called me and was like, "I would like to hear it from you. Not the system".

I identify a lot more with written statements than spoken ones. Maybe because they stand longer and are more unambiguously ambiguous. The most difficult thing about blogging is that you need something to write about. My friend,a fellow blogger here, was like, "How do I get ideas? I dont. I just let my thoughts wander and write." It does not matter whether somebody has written about it. Whether it is opiniated BS. It is yours and you just let it flow.

But I can't write about something that I have in mind if I find it already discussed in a blog. Like cutchery season in Madras. I knew that everyone will have something for the season and so did not even manage a few lines. New Year..I studiously avoid such discussions. But there are some ideas that I would have been planning to write about for months, thinking, building it up. Suddenly I would stumble onto an archive that will throw my plans into disarray. Bah!!

So do I give up blog hopping? No. I guess not. It is like this. When I read blogs, amateur writing is literally grammatized( tamil : ilakana paduthuthal). I see different sections of the populace, the fears, the thoughts, the ambitions. More often I see a change in thinking. Especially Indian bloggers. I see the drift to the first world thinking. Lavish living and lifestyles. I permeate into the mind of my fellow Indian in India.

Recently in the past year, when I have been following blogs pretty closely, I observe that Indians live like First World citizens these days. Promiscuous lifestyles, easily accquired deficiency syndromes, partying till dawn, high flying salaries, more and more international brands, psychotic behaviour, horrendous crimes, decline of indigenous culture.

Hmm. There seems to be a lot of "hep" surrounded with drinking, dancing, partying, dating, sex(wild), orgasms and language(pretty bad at it). All of a sudden something that was taboo is on the streets for anybody to buy. Anything is for sale.

I guess the society was too constricted at first. Too much pent up feelings. A desire to be wildly free. The dam burst at the first oppurtunity. Opening up of India to world markets. Hmm. The lack of real culture. That cant be penetrated by anything. Like a balloon that was tied up and the air molecules that were straining to be free. India has blown itself in all directions.

What I DON'T see is a change in the lacklustre sports performance. Mindless films which an averagely intellectual movie watcher(If there are any) would trounce. Deteriorating family situations. Polarizations. Same stupid, useless politcal scenario.

I do think these that the so called NRIs are more Indian than India's Indians. The NRIs here are called ABCDs(American Born Confused(Hmph!) Desis). I really dont know who is more confused.

Living in third world conditions, shutting eyes and refusing to believe that you are in India, mass migrating to big cities, ape America mindlessly, believing that clothes and language are the reflections of attitude, serious attitude problems...The list is really endless.

When we discussing this issue, my friend commented that it was probably because they are trying to be what they have never been allowed to. Free will.

Hmm. Free will. Isnt it strange that people use their free will in sex, crime, marijuana,...Why not apply them in more productive ideas(not sex please)? Politics. Why dont try lifting India to the highs? Why cant you make India a first world? Becos you think you are already in it.

It is easy to be in America and comment about India. Accepted. But I am doing exactly the same thing as you are. Outsourcing my brain.

I guess given the chance to return to India, I would think about it. For I am an Indian here but in India, I should be an American to be considered Indian.