Life la..

"Life la.."

Most of my sentences have started with this. Almost equivalent to Vasu's "thobar". Thathuvams to virakthees, happiness to Mt.Everest..have poured forth of my mouth with these simple two words; One of which is totally meaningless. (Which one though?)

So I think this blog is dedicated to "Life la.."

Each of us have a personal nook, a corner where nobody else can penetrate. Mine is a corner where my heart is fossiled over the years by heaps of sediments of feelings, circumstantial behavior or incidents have been forced into.

There is a friend of mine who keeps saying that suffering is an absolute quantity. He compares the suffering of various people and says, what is your suffering when compared to his? to her? to all those who approach him with their sorrows.

Some turn back effectively consoled while I smile an empty smile and leave(each time) vowing never to return again.

My corner stores memories from childhood with appa, amma and anna. Teenage with my friends, appa, amma and anna. Now. Post mature( :)))) life with mom. My mom is the closest person to me in this world now.

As I go back and forth in the pensieve of my memories, I see times when I have literally cried to be given a different mom as a kid. My perspectives grotesquely skewed now, I stand at a point where everything, literally everything I believed in has lost its circumstantial evidence and have not withstood the passage of time.

Amma. Appa. Anna. Relations. My so called friends. My so called enemies. The oh-so-great God.

Life la...

Of sufferings untold and unheard of, of compassion, mercy, happiness and the fleeting nature of life. I stand cowing down before a sea of humanity that point their accusatory finger at me and say like,"you who are so blessed..."

Life la..

Of values and cultures that once stood up for a man. What a man might do when in such and such circumstance. What he might not. Where are those values now?

Life la..

Of beliefs that have belied themselves, of trusts that have come apart, of love that has failed, of so many other failures.

Life la..

Of success and joy, exultation and admiration, respect, fun, all the positive exuberances.

Life la..
Of perceptions and perspectives that have stayed and got skewed grotesquely..

There is no end to the kaleidoscope of emotions that gather around us.

Life la..

Of surprise: That the air around us might carry so much of music, heat, passion, warmth, animosity, ill will, benovelance, sound, noise, words..Of things untold and unsaid. Of etchings on human faces gone forever.

We opened a Pandora's box when we started to think. When we start to crawl out of the box, it is generally too late to change. Rigid notions and opinions, unchangeable doctrines. Unhappiness, inability to accept.

One causeth the other.

I really don't know how to end this post. I was thinking along two different lines and I shall know only when I read this post what I have written.

Whatever.